sometimes love is expressed in hard words

solemn faith. pathetic walk.
distant prayers - few and far between.
are you more concerned about things of this world, or Christ?
do you get upset over trivial, fleeting matters, or upset over sin?
is the root of your brain stuck to garbage, or scripture?
does your message convey academia, or the gospel?
are you more concerned with finding your place in this world, or finding your identity in Christ?
do you love God how you ought to, or do you know more about television programs than you should?

anyone can say "God", and stay general enough that most relate to that term, not everyone will proclaim Jesus. the cross is ugly. sin is disgusting. weak faith is even more so repulsive. death isn't part of the intended plan. repentance is hard. atonement is bloody. betrayal is devastating. grace is unmerited. faith is hard. trusting is difficult. forsaking pleasures of the flesh is unnatural. choosing God is impossible.

the Gospel is hard to believe, and many wont.

for myself, these things are true. i know they are for you too.
those questions at the beginning, they are hard nosed questions that should either convict you, or encourage you for how hard you're trucking with the Lord. and if you're not convicted, consider your faith and its genuineness. being raised in a "christian" home doesn't mean anything, which i can attest to. it's hard being a second generation christian...because my parent's faith seemed to have coat tails, except that this world quickly consumed me because i wasn't living in Christ. that was years ago. i have only come to this point in my life with faith and pursuing God, because God pursued me first. and with much difficulty, struggle, pain, tears, anger, frustration, confusion, illumination, joy, peace and way of the Holy Spirit, i've genuinely come to this place of seeing solidified areas of my life. even after much prayer and deliberation, studying the scriptures, fellowshiping with the saints, defending my faith and seeing huge changes in my life, i can only point it all to submitting my life to the Lord.

what matters to you? i know what matters to me.
i don't want to fulfill my heart's desires, i want God to.

if your faith is weak, grow up.
if you don't care, you're pathetic.
if you don't have faith, ask God to reveal himself.
if you have strong faith, keep pressing - you encourage me and bless our Lord.
if your life is hung up around idols and self preservation, quit them and stop sinning.

I read this verse and was completely convicted:
Deuteronomy 4:23 Take care, lest you forget the covenant of the LORD your God, which he made with you, and make a carved image, the form of anything that the LORD your God has forbidden you. 24 For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God.


you wouldn't even know it, but i love you too much to let you go on without thinking about these things. i really do love you.