in my experience...

(Sorry in advance for the long post, you probably have better things to do...haha)

God has truly redeemed me and rescued me to His satisfaction and providential grace.
There's not any explanation before my eyes, in my past or within reason to come to terms with why he is so kind and loving towards me. I still do things that make me question my loyalty to my Savior. God is incredibly merciful and patient with me. THAT is remarkable.

I am wretched and vile, destitute and broken within all sinful wickedness that is me, and humanity.

Apart from Christ, I can do no good thing - as scripture says - and testimony to my life.


With that said:
I have seen evidence time and time again in my life that where God gifts me, prompts me, convicts me and moves me in my heart and through conduits in my day to day, His will permeates through all ambiguity and lack of clarification.

An illustration I like to use is: God's will is a White Line, my will is a Red Line. Often in Christendom and the modern Church, the common thought (and misconception) is that the White Line, God's will, is to be pulled over into one's Red Line. Hence, God's will is in your life. That sort of thinking breaks down to God being the mortar between the bricks that make up life. This gives God the treatment of secondary importance, possessing no Lordship, and at best, de-godding God. The way it ought to be viewed, practiced and lived out is this: my Red Line is worthless, and it ought to be wrapped up in unison with the White Line so that there is total surrender, complete reliance and utter dependency upon the grace, providence and mercy that God does give. That my life and will is so wrapped up in God's own will that I have no choice but to follow Him. Essentially getting dirty and taking the position of the mortar between the building blocks that God places in one's life. We call that mortar stewardship.

Before even making analogous the imagery in my life, those things were slowly, increasingly true for the better part of three years. Obviously* shown in different respects and outlets of my personality, internally and externally.

So where am I going with this? Oh yes...
Submission to God in whatever context, is always a task, and worth it. Where he prompts my heart, those things usually happen. Not to be viewed as "This thing is on my heart, and it will now happen...", because I'm not a neo-pantheist, nor am I practicing "The Secret" by declaring my heart's desire to the universe! HA! What I am saying is that God guides me to places unknown, and those things dwell deeply in my heart for long periods of time, and 99% of the time, I have no clue what to do, until given an external prompting. (Whether that's council, the Word, social cues...) And things that are my flesh, or desire, or other people's desire for my life, quickly fade and mean nothing.

I dont even know if any of that makes sense, but I do know I desire to grow so close to my Lord that I can hear His continuous, marvelous calling on my life. That is also quite the task in and of itself.


PS- It's interesting thinking about the Doctrine of Election with regards to being called. God's calling doesn't stop at salvation, as it is a continuous guidance and communication from Him throughout the life of a Christian. Called to salvation, called into full-time ministry (which every Christian is to some degree), called to Preach the Word [to all nations], called to Sanctification, and eventually called home. That's pretty epic to me. I've been dwelling on that a lot lately. Anyway...that's it for now.

Soli Deo Gloria.

*I am nowhere near perfect and I screw up quite a bit, but I can see how God works and refines and corrects.