where but for the grace of God go I

it's late. just got home.
my back aches, long day.
i am busy, and God has given me a full life.
not busting at the seams, but things to keep my mind on Him.

i don't know what to say right now.
being humbled by the grace that God generously gives is overwhelming.
the cross is meant to flatten me, so that God is so immensely centric in my life,
that it's not even a thought in my brain to consider my needs first.

God has lead me to this point.
to right now - to the history he's given me.
to the heavy heart, and way of thinking.
to this appreciation and desire for scripture.
to this love for Him and His Church.
to this passion for theology and music.
to this aspiration and call to be a pastor one day.
to serve and give, all that I can.
all these are results of His Love.

Lord, change me more into the man you want me to be.
Convict me more of sin. Make me set apart for your good work.
Give me the mind and heart to live out your commands.
Write your precepts on my heart, lead me in your ways,
for You, alone, Yahweh, are worthy of all I am.