the strangest thing:

I had the weirdest feeling today.

It was an overwhelming emotion that I'll probably be THAT person who is single with a full life in his late twenties. I'll be heavily focused on work and music, maybe other things. I don't really understand any of it. But I do not see myself with anyone in particular in the next 4-5 years.

I don't see myself anywhere else but here. (not geographically, but situationally)

I had the greatest experience today.

It was an overwhelming sensation of direction, positive reinforcement, constructive admonishing and $100 steak. My bosses treated me and a few other co-workers to an extremely nice dinner. One of the nicest steakhouses on the planet. Unreal. Treated like a celebrity; I dare say, a billionaire.

Best meal I've ever had. Absolutely floored by my bosses reaction/reflection to the last year of my work and progress. I feel more encouraged right now in my life - and I don't even remember ever feeling this great about things.


I think my brother will find a nice girl. Hopefully, prayerfully he finds Jesus first.
I think my sister will find a guy, get married finally and have a kid before me.
I think I will be the one who is the fun, single uncle with my mom constantly bombarding me with inquisitions as to whom I'm interested in, or whom I have my eye on.

Anymore, I don't know much more than making the things I have in my life, the very best things they can be. It's going to take tremendous effort, sacrifice, diligence and work, but I am very determined, very motivated and driven to achieve this goal of perpetuating success. Success defined by my terms.

I'm stepping up to the plate to be more of a man, and get rid of pacifism.