three hours until I have to go to work...and my mind is completely elsewhere than sleep.

I don't even know why I'm still awake. My thoughts have broken the law
and today was incredibly lonely for the most parts between 7am and 5pm.

I thought about murder, and how to get away with it.
I thought about robbing a bank, or being a hit man.
I thought about filming all of it, and becoming this viral pseudo-lebrity.

They'd let that stuff fly on the news/youtube.
Every time I pull espresso shots at work, I think about expressing myself..somehow.
And most people still don't get me. which is understandable. i'm very incorrigible.

But I also get freaked out when I look at MMA fighters who are twenty
and Justin Beiber and his success
And the other people who are my age or less, that are a lot further along than me.

Did I go wrong? and if so, where? I should have had my degree by now, but I decided to be a partier.

I want a real job, and a loveofmylife style purposeful girl.
I want to see people meet Jesus, and share the gospel.
I want to not be afraid to invite people at the drive thru of Wendy's when they hand me my fruit punch with light ice.  And somehow write a song that's heartbreaking.

Ok, just kinda got tired. I feel a cough coming on... :-*(