I never thought about love, when I thought about home...


Curious how simple and often it is I forget about my family being blood. If I'm to be honest, Mom, Dad, Haylee and Skyler over the past few years have seemed to be people I live with that have nothing in common. (Excluding the year I lived with Zach, of course.)

But spending nearly every night in the confines of my house, I see that I really have missed out on them growing old, and me sharing my life. I hate that disconnect that lapses in my brain, but I do realize they are mine and I am theirs. I guess watching Parenthood in contrast with real life made me think about interacting with my siblings once we're all happily married and independent. It made me think really hard about what is going to happen next.

There is this lingering chasm, though, that seeps into my mind. It's this proverbial "bummer" that hovers over my head. I feel this utterly weird disconnect from everyone and everything. I feel like I'm the only one on an island in the middle of a city. I feel like I've lost my place in my own world, and architecture has lost all foundation. I guess it's a weird spot I'm working through...God's putting me through a season of refinement, to prepare me for even more refinement afterwards.

I DON'T want to miss out on this...