Well, mostly that things aren't as bad as they seem. I think I just gotta keep some regiment of "busy". I've gone on to have worked forty plus hours a week, but I'm needing more things to keep me from going crazy.
I got to work with Tony for a Rock Music promo video, which he asked me to make the music for. That was a good project to have over the weekend, considering I was cooped up at home. It was rad to write a mini-score for it, and he is going to have me start doing more musical implementations for all-things church media. It's good to collaborate with him again. I feel like I always get this specific creative streak when I work with Tony, or do anything for the Church, and that makes me happy. Seeing as how we're in different house churches, I feel like there's this unintentional separation of persons, but it's cool to see how things pick right back up regardless of the time it's been.
Speaking of music, I met with Rob tonight to discuss the course of our hip hop project, and it looks like things will be swinging back into gear, which excites me. It'll be a new approach to music, and a different way to serve. I'm still praying with much deliberation and council as to what to do pertaining to leading worship, and my heart very much leans towards getting back into it in a few months, but I also want to fully surrender my heart to the Lord and let him work out some things in the meantime.
This week was also the start of a new position at work. I got promoted to shipping manager and am in charge of fulfilling all orders and shipping them. That came with a significant raise as well, and I'm humbled by the kind praise I've received from my bosses; Glory to God for all of it. That allowed for me to buy some new gear for music too, which always makes me excited.
I'm eager to meet up as a band again in March to pray and share and hang out. I feel like too often I have my head down, and all I can see is my shadow and shoes, and lose all sorts of direction. I really need to be disciplined on looking to Christ for all my needs and answers - all satisfaction and validation. I freak out over everything and get so so worked up, but then a week passes by and I realize how much I've missed it (by looking at myself). I feel like March will turn up to be a lot of things, and I feel like still in the pre-stages of this February's winter thaw, God is preparing me for much.
I've gotta be diligent in sticking my nose deep in the word...well, more like my heart. I've gotta get back to genuine. I've gotta get back to Jesus first, always. Anyway, I'm thinking that's how to land this time around. The fog is starting to lift, and I'm again starting to live.
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