can't sleep...thanks national

this is a first in a while. sleepless nights that is.

I've been plugging through all day, non-stop, since 6 A.M. and lots internally and externally to deal with.
And there are moments when I feel like I'm getting so close, like almost in sync. It's moments like that which makes my heart skip a beat. Been listening to High Violet all night - and it's one of those entire-album nights, and it's got me in this introspective mood. The most creative/artistic moment I've felt in a while. A lot of it got focused in a journal, which has been a while, some of it on sketch, and then I took a vogue picture of my face. This is that picture:

and it's one of those "so tired I can't sleep" feelings. I'm entirely acquiescent to just surrender, because the other end of this is so disarming anyway. So there's no use in trying to hold on to the specific things I want. What I want now is to lay down in the mud so you don't have to get your feet dirty.

Sorry for being vanity fair, I'm trying to be a good pilgrim, and I've just gotten tired from a long week. No excuses, just honesty. Keep my head on my shoulders, and my hand in my pocket until you come stand next to me. Keep my heart in my chest, and sold to Christ. Keep my tongue clenched between my teeth, because I don't have a lot to say, because I want to listen.